


If I Were A Boy

by TheAnimeZankyou



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, F/M, Fantasy, Fate, Hurt, Romance, aoki - Freeform, aokise - Freeform, fem!Kise - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-22
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2019-01-04 03:29:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12160608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAnimeZankyou/pseuds/TheAnimeZankyou
Summary: After a harsh fight with Aomine, Ryouka wishes that she could be a man as well, just so she could understand what goes through her idiot's boyfriends mind, fate answers her prayers and she becomes Kise Ryouta.





	If I Were A Boy

I heard the smash of the glass as it shattered to the floor and the groan of his voice. Hoping, that a small shard had scratched him. Then with the slam of the door, I stormed out the room with a suitcase full of my things. I didn’t look back to see if his face was in pain. I just didn’t want him to see the tears that were streaming down my face. Luckily, the night was warm as I walked the stranded streets heading to my sister’s house; she lived closer than anyone else. It wasn’t that late as I walked the quiet streets. There were some stragglers that were coming home from the pub all drunk. 

I never thought that heartache could hurt so bad. The heart was a fragile organ that felt like was tearing itself into two. Despite the heavy bag, I never thought that my body would break down just because of a broken heart. My knees quivering with every step I took. My boots clicking against the pavements. My feet were already sore from the pinching of my boots.

The moon shone brightly in the darkest of the skies. The sky was a dark blanket that covered the whole of Japan. I never thought that I would look at the sky with such a glazed eyes. Aomine was my whole world. I put all of my heart into that relationship and he didn’t care for me as much as I had cared for him. He allowed the whore to come between and destroyed our once ever-lasting relationship. I was always there for him and yet he couldn’t be beside me for just a small while. I told him everything, from my secrets to my deepest fears and yet he never opened to me at all. I can’t be in a relationship where it was too physically exhausting to guess what he was thinking. He wouldn’t even tell me when he was ill or when he was grateful for all I did. 

Sometimes I wished I knew what was going through his head. I wished I was a male as well just to understand even the tiniest thing that runs through his thick skull. Just to witness his tiniest movements of the lower intellectual. Or if he could understand what was like to be a female. As I walked to my sister's house, all I could think about is what it would be like to understand what was going through his mind. 

I sat on the park bench, my suitcase at my feet, looking at all the couples who shared the warmth even though it was warm enough. I felt hazy as a sudden gust of wind blasted towards me and I felt nauseous all of a sudden. The wind was ever haunting like there was a whisper. There was a little message that was telling me that it was granted. Everyone was acting like there wasn’t a bone-crushing wind coursing through their bodies. Was it only targeting me? Through the gale force winds, my eyes instinctively closed as it was too powerful.

When the wind eased up, I no longer felt nauseous to the point I was going to pass out. Though the world looked slightly different before I couldn’t quiet put my finger on it. I tried to brush my long hair but air slipped through my fingers. My hair was now shorter - it reached only the nape of my neck. My hands were not my hands, they were much manlier but still as smooth as my own. 

I grabbed my bag and found the compact mirror that was inside. It was still me but I was different: I was a male. I was still skinny, just a little bulkier. My eyes were still large hazel orbs. He still had the same bone structure as me but there was just something that made me look more like a male than I ever did. Did someone answer my prayer? Though I wanted to be a male I just didn’t know what to do in my new form. There was not a part of me that was dreading, Fates new course. Fate had answered my prayers, so there was no reason to complain. 

I saw the strangest glares thrown my way. It was only my body that had changed and not my clothes so I still had my female clothes on. I began dreading that I was wearing a tight minidress and knee-high boots. My legs did look good in the get up my boots pinched even more than usual. I grabbed my suitcase and headed into the closest store and quickly went shopping for clothes to suit the new me. 

I ignored the looks on the shop floor assistants and grabbed a few items and headed into the changing room. I grabbed all the tickets and paid for the clothes after wearing them all. Usually, within a store, it would take a good half an hour or so just find the first outfit, then realize that it was not right and then take more time finding the perfect outfit. In this new form, it took me ten minutes to find, try and pay for an outfit. One thing guy doesn't need to worry about how they look, they just throw clothes on and it works. Not for my past self, getting ready takes a lifetime. 

I ran all the way to my sister’s home and threw my things in. As a man, I no longer needed my handbag but I would feel completely empty with it. I grabbed my new wallet and threw all my money into the small thing and placed both my phone and wallet into my new deep-pocketed jeans. Ahh, jeans that have decent pocket size, not the bloody imaginary ones on female jeans. My first thing as a man, was to find out what goes through Daiki’s thick skull so I tracked his phone to see where was heading and unsurprisingly it was our local bar with a few of his mates. If I wanted to learn about his mind, I would need to observe him in his natural habitat. 

The bar was dingy and dark, I never ventured in here in my female form as it never looked appealing. The floors were dirting my brand new boots. As soon I stepped in I felt like I was going to lose my shoes from the sheer suction just to take a step. There were men already on the floor, drunk out of their mind. The lights were barely hanging on by a single wire. Cobwebs hanging in the corner. I tiptoed past all the drunkards and headed up to the bar and saw Aomine sitting alone staring into space, slowly stirring his drink. 

“ A pint please,” I lowered my voice as my voice had not changed one bit. It was still as high and pitchy as ever. My eyes glancing over at Daiki, he looked so glum sitting there alone.

“He’s taken, pal,” I heard the bartender say. I snapped out of my trance and faced him. The bartender was a large male with a buzzcut hair and tattoos up and down his arms - not my type. 

“Sorry, I was thinking. Not staring,” I defended myself but he rolled his eyes and held his hand out wanting his money. I leafed a bill out the waller and handed it to him. Copying his action when I was waiting for my change. Normally I drink sweet cocktails but they didn’t serve them here. I sat a table at the back and kept an earshot away from Daiki.

A few minutes later, his loud bouncing friends came bounding in and placed an arm around his shoulders. I never liked most of them anyway. Except for Kuroko - he is quiet. Aomine never changed his depressed aura even when Haizaki started insulting him.

“Dude! What changed? Your girl pregnant?” Aomine ignored his comments. I wanted marriage then children but Aomine simply dismissed my comments. I tried to drop hints every time we were shopping but he was looking at the basketball scores. Rude arrogant fucker! Haizaki never let it rest though, as he asked stupid questions.

“Go find some gay guy to pick up and leave me the fuck alone,” Aomine finally spat back at him. Haizaki stood on the bar stool, ignoring the grumbles from the bartender. His eyes searching the room. I tried to avoid eye contact as all the men Aomine was friends with, he was the one I hated the most. Every new year and Aomine’s birthdays, there was always a chance that he was hitting on me. Gliding his hands up my legs but I would move away and cling to Aomine. There were moments when he was hitting on me that I felt like I was cheating so I grabbed Aomine by his collar and kissed him hard in front of his friends. I knew Haizaki was staring so I made sure to entice him a little by snaking one of my legs around his hips. All his friends whooped when Aomine kissed back and squeezed my ass.

Unfortunately, I heard as he jumped off the stool and charged straight for me. He scooted right next to me and placed a hand on my knee and slid his hands up. Now, I needed to burn these trousers and they were new. 

“Sorry... mate, I’m very much straight,” Aomine and I locked eyes just for a moment. He smiled gently and ushered me over. Haizaki took my hand and lead me to his group of friends. I hated that I was in with his friend group especially since the rat held my hand and lead me there. But I was close to him that I wanted to hug him and tell him that I still love him but not in this form.

“Yo, Blondie. What’s your name?” he grumbled. He wasn’t drunk yet. From what I could tell, the drink currently on the table was his first. 

“Kise Ryou-ta,” I bit my lip hoping that he wouldn’t notice the slip-up. He stood up and placed a hand on my shoulder. 

“Mmm. Are you somewhat related to my ex-girlfriend, Kise Ryouka?” My eyes widened as he declared me as one of his ex’s. If my heart wasn’t broken before, it was now. I was just another one of his ex’s. A vague memory that will be binned when he decided to return home. As I tried to compose myself in front of him, I couldn’t let up that I was, in fact, his girlfriend or his ex-girlfriend, his friends rubbed his shoulders sending their condolences. I AM NOT FUCKING DEAD! I wanted to scream at them. The only thing that you would consider dead was our love. 

“Why Daiki, she was good for?” Kuroko said. Finally a voice of reason. I was good for you but you never showed me any love or affection except when you wanted sex. I never chased you away and left you your space but goddammit a girl needs affection. A little rose or at least tell me you love me. 

“No. Never heard of her,” I lied. It was difficult not to allow my voice to waver and show any emotion. Kuroko looked at me with curiosity but I kept my eyes glued to you. Aomine turned around and I saw the scar on his cheek. The glass did hit you. I’m sorry, baby. How is it possible that I simultaneously love and hate you? I want to harm you but then I want to cradle you.

“Seriously dude, you and Ryoka broke up? Now next question how long does a mate have to wait for it be acceptable to take control of your girl?” Haizaki asked. I jumped back as Aomine grabbed his shirt and pushed him against the wall.

“Don’t you dare touch her! Dude, my girl can’t stand your ugly mug!” It was hard not to smile when I heard him call me his girl. Kagami grabbed his jumper and pulled you off Haizaki, all I could do was watch as you protected me from that creep. I turned to the bartender and asked for another allowing a smile to evade my face. My inner self-dancing like a lunatic just because he called me his.

“So now that you’re single, wanna head to a strip bar?” Aomine turned to his drink and ignored the rest of us. On the sticky, table, that had chunks missing for no reason was his phone with my number and that he called me several times. I turned around and snuck my phone out to see that he had called me and had left several voicemails. I excused myself from the group and headed to the back where there was a court for people to smoke.

I leaned against the wall and pressed listened to all of the messages.

“Hey babe, I am so sorry for my actions that made you get angry at me and pushed you...”  
“...Pushed you away from me. Please come back to me and we can work this out. There is nothing…”  
“...Nothing that we can’t work out. I...” I hung up the phone as soon as Aomine leaned against the wall beside me. I saw that he had a cigarette in his hands. I have never seen him smoke in god knows how long. I completely forgot that he smoked. He was addicted back in high school. 

“I didn’t know you smoked,” before he turned to me, he blew a puff of smoke. 

“I did. My ex...she made me stop. Well, I don’t think she minded but I stopped for her as she probably doesn’t want to be kissing someone who smells like smoke. Dude, she was the best girlfriend I ever had. She was loyal as hell and made me laugh and was completely honest with me and I took her for granted. I don’t think I cherished her as much as much as I should have. God, I want to see her but her phone keeps going through to voicemail,” without realising it, my hand was lingering just above his and I quickly snatched it away. God, I was losing control. Aomine was opening up to a stranger, was it because I look like my past self some way?

“Aww dude, you got yourself a new toy. He likes the young blonde's,” Aomine handed me the cigarette and for the first time, I tried a small puff. I spluttered after a small drag. That thing was wretched. Kagami who joined us and took the cigarette of me and showed me how it was done. “Finally smoking again. Ryoka will never take you back now,” Aomine grabbed his cigarette and took a puff and blew the smoke in his face, I laughed hard as Kagami grabbed him and they began their ‘fighting’. It was nice to see him smile like that but he never smiled like that with me.

“Now you asshole, we are going to a strip club. Get a lap dance or don’t. Your girl will never know,” Aomine rolled his eyes and looked at his phone. From where I was standing, he was just looking at the lock screen. It was just me, rolling around in our covers. It was a random day after sex and I had popped my head out under the covers. My arms covering my breasts.

“That your girl?” I asked, keeping up the charade that I was not his girl.

“Yeah, it was the same day that she told me that she loved me,” That was right. We were randomly making out in the street and I let it slip that I was in love with him. Aomine had declared his love for me ages ago and he was patiently waiting for me to say it back. I can’t believe that he remembered that day and I completely forgot.

“Let’s go to the strip club,” He said and my heart dropped. It was so typical of him, saying gentle things making me fall for him but then saying something else that completely destroys the last thing you said. “You coming too, Ryouta?” I nodded and followed the guys out the dingy pub.

It was hard watching Aomine walking on his own, on the roads that we have walked. Many couples walking past us, laughing; holding hands; clinging onto each other's arms, and generally loving the hell out of each other. I watched as Aomine pulled out his phone, dial a number and held it against his ear. I silently pulled out my phone to see that Aomine was calling me. My finger hovering above the answer button. I wanted to hear his voice as he spoke to me, tell him to come home and that I would be waiting, that no matter what I will always love him. Then again, he dismissed all my advances and I will be in the same miserable spot as I have been in for a while now. But if I didn’t tell him that I was miserable then nothing would change. As I pressed to answer, the phone cut off and I was left with a missed call.

“Hey, babe. Call me. I just wanna hear your voice. I cleaned up the glass so don’t worry about that. You stormed out so quickly I just want to know you were okay. Please call me back or answer when I call,” I heard him say quietly down his phone. I hid behind a tree and brought out my phone, I hovered above his number but I let the phone fall out my hand. I slumped against the tree. I was a huge fucking coward. Though he calls me his ex in front of his friends, he is lying to himself. All those voicemails are Aomine trying to get back together with me. For the first time in our whole relationship, he was begging for me to come back. Usually, it was me begging and pleading to accept me as I was. All of our fights ended up with sex. I looked towards our crowd was heading and saw that he sat on the bench, clutching his hair. Kuroko sitting beside him, massaging his shoulder.

“I loved her and now I have lost her. I swear to the almighty that there was nothing going on between me and that waitress. She came to me and I told her repeatedly that I was in a very happy relationship. I paid for my meal and left. Ryouka saw the lipstick stains on my work shirt and got angry. I never saw any other woman beside her. I love Ryouka, Tetsu.” I covered my mouth from letting out large sobs as the tears streamed down my face. He loves me and always has. I just want to run up to him and kiss him like we always have and swear to trust him no matter what he says. 

Another large gust of wind blew past much like before, nauseating and so powerful. When the wind brushed past I was freezing, I could feel it shaking my bones. I was so freaking cold. But strangely my neck was covered by long wavy hair. My hands were again long and slender. I was me again. As I stood up my clothes were far too huge for me. I looked at the moon and smiled brightly despite the tears. As the clothes dared to fall down, I chased after Aomine who began walking away.

“Daiki!” I screamed so loud that many people turned around especially you. I ran as fast as these insanely large shoes would allow and jumped into the warm embrace of your arms and sobbed the hardest you have ever seen. I felt your arms wrap around me, keeping me protected from the cold. The soft kisses to my hair as I sneaked my arms under your jacket. For once, I felt the tiny drops of tears that flowed from your eyes. I have never seen you cry about our relationship but I never want to harm you again. You are as fragile as my heart and I love you so much. 

“Ryoka, baby. I am so sorry. I love you, babe. Please never forget that ” there was no one else in the world besides you and me. I never realised that Haizaki and Kagami came back to look for us. Or that it began to rain ever so lightly. All I need was your warm embrace. Aomine kissed my forehead so gently that I wanted so much more from him. The tears wouldn't stop flowing from my eyes. Stroking my back, he tried effortlessly to try and calm down my sobs. His gentle words were so soft and gentle that I hid my face in the crook of his neck.

“Aww dude,” He pulled apart when Haizaki spoke. His arm laid around my waist, keeping me in close to his body. “Your girl came back. Guess we ain’t going to the strip club now,” he groaned in distress. Aomine kissed my hair as the creep spoke to his friend group.

“You are more than welcome to go but I’ll be taking Daiki home with me,” I grabbed his hand and pulled him along the street with me. The blue haired idiot laughed as he intertwined our fingers together. I don’t think he was that disappointed in not going to the strip club with his friends. His priority is sorting out our issues with me and going to a strip club would not help his cause at least one bit.

“Thank god for that. I couldn’t be bothered with going to the strip club with that idiot. Who needs to pay to look at mediocre women when the hottest girl I know is lying in my bed and would love to strip for me,” That was one time I offered him a striptease. His friends wanted to get him a stripper for his 21st but I had easily changed his mind with a tease of my own. Aomine was content with holding hands in public, there was a small smirk at the side of his mouth. A much different from the male who looked like he had lost it all. “Ryoka, do you want to tell me why you are wearing men's clothing?” I stopped in the middle of the street, stretched up and aggressively kissed his mouth. How do I explain that I was ‘Ryouta’? He would think I was crazy. Thankfully, he kissed back, in the same manner, his hands staying firmly on my waist. Good, now I have time to somehow explain why I was a man for a brief moment in time.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed reading this story as I had much fun writing it. Inspiration: If I Were A Boy - Beyonce.
> 
> Any comments are appreciated


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